Unusual Blog Alert...

No song today... Can't find the right song... so no song today...

This is super unusual for me. But I gotta get it out. I gotta get this fluttery feeling out. It's a good flutter, but it's for a really stupid reason. And I can't talk to special friend about it because he'll probably get mad at me. I wouldn't blame him actually. I am having an issue...

I've been watching the show Criminal Minds for the last few months. And I gotta tell you... I'm obsessed. Not only with the show, but with Matthew Gray Gubler. He plays Dr. Spencer Reid and I'm friggin obsessed. One day I was watching and I was like "RAWR". So I google this guy and it turns out that there are a million people (read: girls) out there who are more obsessed than me. So that makes me feel 2 things... 1. I am not alone. 2. There are crazier people (read: girls) out there so I don't feel like SUCH a weirdo. Although I still feel awfully weird.

This dude is a director. Well a budding one anyway. When I finish this screenplay (someday, sigh) I want him to direct it. But how does one even go about requesting someone's services like that? Um, hi, I can't pay you, but do you want to direct this movie that was written by a no name girl from the NYC? I imagine that would go over, somewhat, like a lead balloon...

I'm telling you, this dude has me all a flutter. In fact, some of the Criminal Minds shows creep me the hell out, but it's like I gotta watch them... What the fuck?! Does this teenage girl behavior ever go away?! I'm pushing 30. Yes, I'm one year away so I'm allowed to say that now. But seriously, where does this come from? Maybe it's his cheekbones? rawr.

I guess maybe it's because my real life scares the shit out of me, pretty much, on a daily basis. And I need these dreamy thoughts to move along with my day or else I'll spontaneously combust. There are some really good characters in this game of my life... and I absolutely adore them. But at the same time, I live my life in total fear. Every single aspect of my life is full of fear. I am terrorized in my home by my witch, ahem, I mean neighbor downstairs. My job can be really weird sometimes and my love life... well, even though it is really good, at the same time it is a friggin disaster. I need things to dream about to get me out of here for a little while. And this boy just manages to do it for me. He rocks my socks.

Anyway, I have to get back to my real life. The one that scares the shit out of me. But just so we're clear... I'd rather be daydreaming... sigh...

Thanks for reading this unusual post...